Spring

Today the weather was perfect-- a high of 70, with just a little bit of breeze. Finally, after what feels like the longest winter ever, the sun has emerged. The best part about spring, in my opinion, is that I don't have to mentally prepare every time I go outside. I love just taking a step out of doors, and not shivering right down to my socks. Bring on the sandals, everyone :)

Yesterday, as I was working on an urban education paper, the soft breeze swirled through the window. It was getting dark out and I desperately needed some distraction, so I called Ben on video chat.
Hello?
His video finally turned on, and I could see his face.
Hi there. 
Sometimes, when I see him across the computer screen, I forget how for away he really is. I guess I've gotten so used to Skype that it actually feels like I am there with him, in his florescent lit dorm room filled with Albert Einstein posters.

He looked really happy. His olive skin was smooth, and his dark hair was cropped short (above his ears). Seeing him made me feel more at home than I've felt in a long time. And this feeling of comfort is new. I've written before about how we stumbled those first few months apart. The change was big, and it took some time to get used to. But now, I feel...at ease.

I've learned some really important lessons-- ones that you cant get out of books, or at least the ones I've read. The first is to let things go (cue Elsa from Frozen). If I held on to every missed phone call, every lagging conversation, every miscommunication....I wouldn't be in a relationship. I think this is a lesson that Ben understood right from he get-go. But it was one I had to learn (a few times actually).

The second thing is that I have a LOT of fun. I don't have to sit around, just waiting for a phone call. Instead, I have movie nights with my friends, I go out for pho and basically do all the same things I did when I was single. In a way, having a long distance relationship makes life even better, because I have a wonderful balance between romance and friendship.

Finally, I've learned that it's OK to miss Ben. At first, I didn't want to miss him. But it's impossible to block out the things I feel for very long. There have been many nights were all I wanted was for Ben to be there with me. I wanted to feel his arms around me, and fall asleep to the rhythm of his breathing. Those nights were hard. But the more I accepted that I missed his presence, the less painful and frequent those nights have become.

Anyway, I say all this because the start of spring makes everything feel so fresh and new. And that goes for my relationship as well. I feel like I can take a breath, and assess the progress we've made during the cold winter months. But I'm also looking forward to what this new dose of warm weather will bring into my life!
There are some really wonderful things that are happening this spring:

• Passover (I will write more about this soon).
• Visiting Ben and his family
• Cousins Bat Mitzvah
• Cousins Wedding! (I'm really looking forward to this one)

The flowers are blooming, and it seems I'm doing pretty well myself. 

Hopefully the allergies wont be too bad

-Loni